The traffic light has traumatized me. I was thinking of going to that nice park to do some reading today but after I was done dressing, I felt back on my bed to read and sleep. I feel afraid. I don't know why. Afraid of driving because I have yet to receive my potential ticket.

I remember hearing how Tracy got a ticket and she didn't want to drive afterwards. I have that feeling now. This might be all out of being paranoid or the "flash" was a sign to to drive for awhile. I just feel so trapped. I feel I have to find the strength and joy again to drive.. but I'm afraid.